M...Mistakes and Setbacks

When we must deal with chronic illness we seem to have more than our share of mistakes and setbacks. We have a myriad of obstacles that we must overcome in addition to the normal challenges that a healthy person must face. We may have to start each day never truly refreshed, pushing through our daily lives with much of our energy already depleted. Also, we often must fight through pain that is always present to some degree. Many of us additionally have a handful of other symptoms which we must juggle each and every day. This makes failure and problems quite common in our lives.

When I set goals for myself I often underestimate the effect my fibromyalgia can have on my life. This month I decided to join the A to Z Blogging Challenge with all three of my blogs. Since I am unable to work outside my home, I have been trying to expand my freelance writing drastically. I hope someday to make a comfortable income from my writing. My fibromyalgia, though, loves to get in my way. It can prove to be difficult to write through the pain, fatigue, and brain fog. However, I was determined to stretch my writing abilities to the limit, so I can learn to be more efficient as a writer. 

Unfortunately, I wasn’t expecting my fibromyalgia pain to settle in my hands. I also didn’t plan on the stress of my dog getting seriously ill and having to undergo emergency surgery last week. As a result, I got behind on the blogging challenge. Part of me is so angry and frustrated with this setback.

I have decided, though, to use this anger and frustration to my advantage. Instead of giving up and telling myself that finishing this challenge is impossible, I found a way around my pain. Since my hand pain is making typing unbearable, I have set up a speech recognition program on my computer. It isn’t perfect. It doesn’t always understand my words. I have to make corrections at times. And it even has stopped working twice, requiring me to restart my computer. Nevertheless, I’m pleased to say that I am now caught up with the blogging challenge on my writing blog, and I am determined to get the rest of my posts up to date on this blog and my parenting blog.

Mistakes and setbacks are a fact of life, especially for us who suffer from chronic illness. But that doesn’t mean we should roll over and give up on our dreams and lives. Sometimes we have to be super creative and determined to make it through the challenges. Sometimes a solution is not readily available. Regardless, we cannot allow ourselves to give up because life is not life if we fail to live and grow. I encourage you to not lose hope and not give up on your dreams and goals for life. You’re not alone. We can do this together. We can be strong together. We can stay determined together. We can succeed together!

L...Layers and Layers and More Layers, Please!

Fibromyalgia is mostly known for causing widespread pain throughout the body. However, a lot of people don’t realize that this same chronic condition can cause problems with body temperature regulation. Since I developed full-blown fibromyalgia (over 4 years ago), I’ve noticed that I am very sensitive to both hot and cold. If I get too overheated during the summer, I get physically sick to my stomach, and I’m hit with a wave of dizziness and horrible headache.

My sensitivity to cold, though, is much more extreme. During the winter, I have to dress in multiple layers just to be comfortable in my own home (since I can’t be sweating out the rest of the household with the furnace). And whenever I need to go outside, I need to don even more layers. If I don’t keep myself covered with 3 or more layers, the cold makes me hurt to the core. Imagine taking the coldest ice cream and shoving it into an exposed tooth nerve…then multiply that by at least 10. That’s what cold exposure does to me.

Without tons of layers, I feel like I am rolling around in snow drifts completely naked. The pain knocks the breath out of me, and I can feel my warmth escaping from wherever I don’t have enough clothing. My life gets extra complicated during cold weather because I have to make sure I am properly dressed every single day. And the colder it gets the more layers I have to force myself into.

Since I’ve endured a few winters now, I have had a good bit of practice. It is becoming more of a habit. I no longer worry about how fat or uncomfortable I look under all those layers. It’s much more important to me these days to stay warm. Yes, I still sometimes feel strange having to wearing so much clothing at once, especially when people start asking about it. But I try not to allow it to bother me.

Despite all the strange looks and critical comments, we must remember that we shouldn’t worry about what others might think. We must do what we must do to survive another day with a chronic illness, and that is all that matters. Other people might make us feel like freaks of nature, but we just need to keep focusing on how strong we truly are. We keep fighting for daily life even though we face such tough challenges. Keep pressing on, my fellow fibro warriors. We shall prevail!

K...Kind Words and Compliments Will Get You Everywhere

Perhaps one of the hardest parts of having a chronic illness is being surrounded by all the negativity, skepticism, and self-doubt.  Inside and out, we are bombarded by critics telling us that we aren’t really sick or aren’t trying hard enough or not living our lives correctly.  As a result, it is so easy to feel sad, depressed, and useless.

To all of you out there with friends and family members suffering from a chronic illness, this post is for you.  You have the power to build up or tear down your loved ones.  In the dark world of chronic illness, you would be amazed at the effect of a single kind word or compliment.  We have grown so pessimistic and disheartened with life and the reactions of others that sincere positive words would be a glorious and welcomed respite.

Of course, we try our hardest to stay focused on the positive as much as possible.  Still, those negative words and thoughts haunt us day and night.  And our medical conditions seem to always take the forefront of our lives.  You, though, have the power to remind us of the brighter side of life again--merely by taking a moment to share with us things that you appreciate or love about us every now and then.

My late father loved to tease me that flattery would get me nowhere when I was trying to butter him up to get my way.  Of course, in that context, I hated that saying.  With my fibromyalgia, on the other hand, I couldn’t help but turn around this phrase.  Ultimately, sincere flattery really can get you everywhere with your loved ones.  Keep pouring on the compliments, kind words, and encouragement.  You never know how far you can pull your loved ones from the depressing pit of their chronic illness.

J...Juicing Disaster

A friend of mine, who also has fibromyalgia, mentioned to me last year about the benefits of incorporating more raw fruits and veggies into your diet. She said that she had seen some wonderful results with juicing and wanted to get back to consuming fresh juices and green smoothies on a regular basis. She hoped that she could once again reduce her fatigue with this simple dietary change and thought that it would be a great idea for me to give it a try. She explained that although all fruits and veggies are great, the dark green veggies are the most important. I downloaded a juicing/green smoothie recipe eBook, broke out my Ninja, and gathered up some fresh veggies and fruit for the next morning.

For my green veggie, I picked spinach. I love baby spinach in my salad, so I reasoned that it would be easier to start with green vegetables that I was more familiar with. I followed the directions in the eBook and whipped up a beautiful and healthy green smoothie to have with my breakfast. As soon as I opened the lid, though, I started wondering if I could drink the strong-smelling concoction.

Determined to make it work, though, I strained the juice.  Then, I poured a little in a glass and took a sip. Immediately, I spit the awful stuff in the sink. I couldn’t stand the taste, but I didn’t want to waste all the ingredients. I had run out of fruit, though, since I made a double batch. So, I started rummaging through my cupboards trying to find something that could possibly mask some of the potent taste.

I don’t know if it was a case of fibro fog or because I’m not much of a morning person, but I found my chocolate breakfast shake mix and thought that chocolate fixes everything. I scooped a bunch into the Ninja, added some milk and ice, and then blended away again. The color turned an awful greenish-brown, but I wasn’t deterred. I opened up the lid, poured a nice tall glass, and took a deep gulp. And I about died! My makeshift green smoothie was the most putrid thing I have ever tasted in my entire life. It really smelled like something crawled up into my glass, died, and then started rotting. The stench was so strong that my kids came downstairs for breakfast choking and gagging!

In the end, I decided to flush the entire pitcher of smoothie down the kitchen sink, and it stunk up my kitchen for days afterwards. I learned firsthand that juicing and smoothie making is certainly an art form and a science. There is a lot of trial and error involved. But the most important thing I learned is spinach and chocolate do NOT belong anywhere near each other!

I...Icy Hot and Bengay

Related to my A to Z Challenge H post (H…Heat Therapy and Message), my topic for today is Icy Hot and Bengay. I am the first one to admit that absolutely adore muscle rubs. Brand name, generic, or even herbal (Cayenne pepper rub is amazing but expensive!), I always try to have solid supply.

Since I can’t live in hot water or on heating pads and I haven’t yet invented a heated compression suit, I’ve turned to muscle rubs as a source of portable heat. All you have to do is rub some on the sore spots, make sure you thoroughly wash your hands to avoid accidents, and you have almost instant relief, lowering the severity of your pain and cramping.

At one time, I was embarrassed by the smell of muscle rubs. I tried the unscented versions, but I noticed that they weren’t nearly as great as their pungent cousins. In the end, I went back to the normal muscle rubs, strong smell and all. Eventually, I learned to live with the smell and not care. To be honest, I actually find the spicy smell of muscle rubs to be refreshing and relaxing. (They also can help with stuffy noses, an added plus!)

Now I venture out in all my muscle-rub glory. I don’t care how many noses I offend or what people may whisper behind my back. I’m a fibro warrior…smell my aroma! I’d much rather be out living and end up clearing out a room than to be stuck in bed because I hurt too much. Seriously, for those who hate the scent of muscle rubs, I do sincerely apologize. I’m sorry my relief has to come at the cost of your nostrils. Really, though, there are worse smells. And a person’s gotta do what a person’s gotta do when times get rough.

H...Heat Therapy and Massage

One of my cats enjoying my heating pad, too!

If you are a fibromyalgia sufferer like me and have yet to discover the heavenly bliss of heat or gentle massage, I encourage you to see what they can do for you! Since I was a very active person before fibro took hold of my life, I’m no stranger to sore muscles and aches. It was during my early teens that I discovered just how amazing heat and massage can be when your muscles are stiff, sore, and cramping.

Now that I have fibromyalgia, I am a heat and massage addict! If I could live in a Jacuzzi for the rest of my life, I’d be content. But alas, I don’t have the money or the space for a hot tub. In fact, I don’t even have a regular bath tub to soak in anymore. Consequently, I’ve had to be a little creative in meeting my heat and massage needs.

I have a hot water bottle, 2 electric heating pads, and gel packs that can be heated in the microwave. I also have an electric heated massaging mat and a battery-operated heated neck massager. I have even improvised and rolled a golf ball with the bottoms of my sore feet to massage them after a long day. Although my fiancé is more than willing to rub my sore spots, I prefer to have as many backup options as possible in case he is at work or too tired.

Although heat and massage doesn’t cure fibromyalgia or make the symptoms go away, it’s wonderful to have something that can take the edge off the pain and help you relax. When I am having a bad flare day my favorite spot to write is lying on my heated massage mat. It covers many of my worst tender points and clears my head enough that I can think again. This mat is also wonderful for when I hurt so much that I can’t sleep. The heat and rhythmic massaging soothes my aching body and makes me sleepy.

Ultimately, it is important to find what works best for you. Sometimes wet heat works better than dry heat. Some people love rigorous massages, while people like me can usually only handle gentle massages. Even if you can' afford expensive equipment or therapy sessions, there are many cheap options available. Regular heat therapy and massage have improved my quality of life immensely, and it is likely they will offer some relief for you as well.

G...God, Faith, and Sanity

Sometimes, I swear the only thing that keeps me sane is my faith in God and my belief that my body and this earth is only temporary. Living with a chronic illness--especially one that involves a lot of pain and other life-altering symptoms--can make life drag on endlessly. Although I want to live a long, happy life, the idea of having to live a lifetime with my fibromyalgia is overwhelming. I’m at a point in my life when I can only take small steps at a time. I can’t look at the whole journey because right now, it seems far too daunting and impossible.

Still, it’s a wonderful idea for us to always keep in mind where we are actually headed. Life is so short and death so unnatural that I’ve always felt there must be something more than this existence here on earth. And as I grew to discover God and His promises, I began to realize that we really are meant for so much more than what we do while in this life.

I still haven’t a clue why God would allow such pain, fatigue, fibro fog, and my other fibro symptoms to affect me to this degree. Yet, I have faith that there is a higher purpose or reason why I have been lead down this difficult road. I would be lying if I said that the why isn’t important to me anymore. It still is because I am only human and would love to understand my plight.

Despite this, I have come to realize that even though I don’t know the why, I DO know what God generally wants me to do with my fibromyalgia-ridden life. Even though I am plagued by chronic illness, it is still my duty to (1) love the people around me, to (2) give openly and freely to those in need, and to (3) remind others that even in their darkest moments, God still is there.

A few months after fibromyalgia started taking over my life, I realized that I couldn’t let my condition make me bitter or selfish. Even though the days of pain and discomfort seem to stretch on for eternity, this life is very short, and I should be preparing for the life after this. No one really knows exactly what lies at the other side of death. All I know is I want to leave this earth knowing that I lived well, loved harder, and left a positive mark on the world.

F...Fibromyalgia & Fatigue

What seems like another lifetime ago, I used to wake up every morning feeling refreshed and energized. As soon as my alarm went off, someone knocked on my door, or the cheery sun peaked into my window, I was alert and ready to take on the day. Each new day seemed so exciting and I couldn’t wait to make the most of every moment!

Nowadays, I find myself in this exhausted, drained, and worn out rut that I just can’t get out of. I feel like I haven’t slept in days, even though I usually get a full night’s rest. There’s probably a hundred different ways that I could describe how I look and feel every morning. However, nothing probably comes as close to describing my morning zombie-hood than one of my late father’s favorite similes: hammered dog poo-poo (although he preferred a much more colorful ending to that description). I simply feel so beaten, worn, pounded, and ragged that I can certainly identify with that image.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not here to complain or spread the negativity. Rather, I’m putting this all out there for every person who has passed judgment on fibro sufferers and insisted that we are lazy or just don’t try hard enough. Do you realize how hard it is to get out of bed in the morning with every molecule of your body screaming for more rest? It is pretty darn difficult! But you push on and through it because you have places to go and people to see.

Yet, what if you never actually pushed through it? What if it kept repeating? What if this horrible morning haunted you every single day for the rest of your life? Would you keep pushing on day after day after day? Or would you eventually want to give up?

Tell me…after Day 1,000 would you be just as determined and sure that you could get on with your life as you were on Day 1? I don’t think so! And yet, we fibro sufferers must do just that, while enduring all your flack and criticism. What we lack in physical strength and energy, we make up tenfold in inner strength and determination.

Yes, we have bad days, and some days, we stay in bed to try to recoup for another fight against our chronic illness. We readily admit that we get discouraged, frustrated, overwhelmed, and depressed at times. However, we don’t stay that way. It is not in our nature to give up or give in to our fibro. We will fight, struggle, and push against fibromyalgia until the day we die…or at least until our war against chronic illness is won!

E...Every Day Is a New Beginning

Once upon a time, I used to get all bent out of shape because of the little mistakes and failures in my life. When my fibromyalgia became a regular presence in my life, though, these little mistakes and failures started getting bigger and more frequent. When you have a chronic illness that torments you with pain, fatigue, and brain fog a lot of the time there is no way you are going to get everything done and not screw up from time to time. That was an extremely hard lesson for me to learn!

I was so used to being a super mom, a multitasking extraordinaire. I almost never forgot anything, my house was spotless when I went to sleep, and I got an extreme amount of things done daily. I always thought that I could slow down and enjoy life better when I pushed through the hardest part of my life (college during single motherhood). Well, whether I like it or not, my fibromyalgia is making me slow down and enjoy life a little.

I am much more forgiving of myself now. My inner perfectionist still lurks around, but I’ve learned to see every day as a new beginning. If I have a bad flare-up day and can hardly get anything done, I set aside all my frustration, self-anger, stress, and disappointment before I go to bed every night. Then I start fresh the next day and try to make the most of the new chance I have been given.

If you are suffering from a chronic illness like me, which limits your life, I encourage you to forgive yourself of your shortcomings and failures--and forgive yourself again each new day. Your mistakes and disappointments are often not even your fault. You fight so hard every second to make the most of life, but sometimes you just are not physically, mentally, or emotionally able to pull through. But that doesn’t mean you can’t come back tomorrow, next week, or next month and try again. Whether or not you succeed, know that you are amazing and strong just for trying, and coming back to face a defeat again is also a battle won!

D...Doubts, Disappointments, and Deflated Dreams

Chronic illness is a difficult thing to swallow. It can be challenging to treat, usually can’t be cured, and often haunts us until the day we die. Although I try every day to be as positive as possible, I, too, am not immune to the doubts, disappointments, and deflated dreams that chronic illness brings. Just like many of you, I have my low moments, times when I focus a little too much on the negative side of things. I cry over dreams that may never come true. I mourn the loss of the life I once knew. I worry about the days ahead and struggle with doubts that I will ever live a productive life.

Right this very moment I am struggling with my fibromyalgia and the effects it has on my dreams for my writing career. My heart, soul, and mind are overflowing with ideas, inspiration, and determination to reach my goals. Still, my body is weak, and the fibro is winning today. I have so much to write, so much to share, and so much to do. But fibromyalgia has my body so sore and worn that I am typing this with only 3 fingers. The strength and will of my hands left me yesterday because of this enemy within.

In time, I know the blunt of my fibromyalgia will decide to migrate on to another part of my body and most of the strength will return to my hands. It always does. And I will be back to typing fast and easily at my keyboard. In the meantime, I simply need to put the doubts and fears away and to continue pushing through as best I can.

My late father always loved to remind me that defeat doesn’t last very long if we stay strong and never give up. But if we stay down and feel sorry for ourselves for too long, defeat will take root and make it harder and harder for us to throw it off our backs. Some people might call it foolishness or stupidity, but I will keep bouncing right back, no matter how many times my chronic illness knocks me over. Struggling with fibro has gotten me this far. I’m not going to back down now!

C...Cramping Muscles Are Cramping My Style

With spring more or less here, I’m yearning for some mountain biking and hiking. Now that I have fibromyalgia, I am reminded every year that I can’t do nowhere near as much as I used to and that what I can do must be prepared for far in advance. Basically, unless I work myself up to this mountain biking and hiking every spring, I will suffer horrible muscle cramps and pain.

So, here I am, with snow still floating around outside, using an exercise bike a little more each day to prepare for something months in advance--something that I used to do spontaneously at the drop of a hat. When fibro first took hold of my life I resented this to no end. I felt pathetic, weak, and embarrassed. I was ashamed that I couldn’t pursue a simple passion like mountain biking or hiking without training like some loser.

Now, though, I see my little training sessions in a whole other light. Instead of seeing them as a sign of weakness, I actually see them as a sign of strength. They are proof of the pain and effort I am willing to go through to retain a beloved piece of my life before fibromyalgia. No, I’ll never stop hating that the cramping and pain get in the way. Yet, I know now that I can and do have the ability to make small changes against my chronic illness. I do have the power to fight this. And even though it may take me a lot more time and effort than what is normal, I can hold on to the things that I cherish!

Do you have a chronic illness that gets in the way of you doing the things that you love? If so, what strategies have you developed to help counteract your illness? How have you adapted or evolved so you can still do some of your favorite things?

B...Be a B Student: The Importance of Vitamin B

Throughout my childhood, my parents encouraged to be my best and reach for my full potential. In school, they emphasized the importance of reaching and maintaining academic excellence. Wanting to do my best and make my parents proud, I worked hard to be an A student. Never did I think that one day I’d be encouraging myself--and all of you--to be B students.

I know, the B’s I speak of have absolutely nothing in common with school grades…unless of course you consider that these B’s are important for reaching and maintaining life excellence. Yes, the B’s I am speaking of are the B vitamins.

As many of you may know, I endured tons of tests and blood work before my doctor diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. Almost every result was good. However, my doctor did find that my B vitamins were a little low. As a result, he emphasized that I should be taking Vitamin B supplements every day because my deficiency could be affecting my fibro symptoms.

Since before my official diagnosis, I have spent hours and hours researching and reading about fibromyalgia. There are so many theories as to what causes fibromyalgia and what exactly IS fibromyalgia. Many doctors feel that fibro is related to some type of malfunction or injury of the nervous system. Vitamin B12 is essential to the proper function of the body’s central nervous system. Consequently, it is important for anyone with possible nervous system issues to make sure they are getting plenty of B vitamins.

Also, Vitamin B deficiency can cause unpleasant symptoms, including tingling in the extremities and fatigue. I had always assumed that all of my tingling and fatigue was solely my fibro’s fault. However, after taking Vitamin B supplements regularly now for about a year, I've noticed that over half of the tingling is gone and my fatigue isn’t quite as severe as it used to be.

Although vitamin supplements aren’t going to cure chronic illness, we really need to be aware that our bodies can’t function properly without the proper nourishment. By ensuring we have a diet rich of various vitamins and minerals and adding supplements where we fall short, we have the best chances of improving our health and not complicating things by adding unnecessary and easily remedied problems.

Before starting any supplements, please check with your doctor.  Some supplements aren't suitable for individuals taking certain medications or with certain medical conditions.

A...Are There Answers Out There?

If you are like me and have dealt with a chronic illness for years, it’s so easy to want to give up. Day after day, month after month, year after year, we fight and we struggle, but it feels like it’s all in vain! When will our symptoms go away? When will we be able to reclaim our lives? When will all of this finally be behind us?

Unfortunately, the very definition of a chronic illness means that it may never go away. Still, that doesn’t mean we should ever give up on a cure or at least on a better quality of life. Our lives belong to us, NOT to our medical conditions. But if we simply give up, we are handing over ownership to our health problems. Our lives will no longer be our own. We will be slaves to our every little symptom and to the multitude of negative thoughts and emotions that spawn from them.

I don’t know about you, but I’d much rather spend my life searching for answers and end up never finding any. Wasting my life by simply giving up now and wallowing in my chronic illness until the end just isn’t my style. My parents didn’t raise me to be a quitter, and I’m not going to start now. I may always have more than my fair share of defeats, and I might now bounce back as quickly as I’d like. Still, I’m in not just for today’s battle but the long, ugly, drawn-out war.

If you are considering giving up or feel you can’t go on, I encourage you to pause and rest for a moment. Just breathe, exist in the here and now, and don’t worry about the future. Pretend a minute from now doesn’t even exist. Know that you aren’t alone. There are lots of people who understand what you are going through. And we are here for one another.

Rest in that thought for as long as you need and then come back fresh to face the difficult journey again. I once thought that the distance I covered in life is what truly matters. However, fibromyalgia has taught me well that it’s not the distance in your life that is important. It is the life in your life. We may be limited in what we can do now, but are we wholly embracing what we CAN do?

No, living with a chronic condition isn’t easy, but life doesn’t have to end…if we stay strong and determined and if we focus on the good that is still in our lives. Back when my fibro wasn’t so intense I almost never had the chance to write. Now I get to write every day, and I’ve fallen in love with this first love all over again. I still miss the life I had and wish I could be ‘normal’ again. Still, I refuse to dwell on the negative. I WILL have the full and long life I’ve always wanted, no matter what!

Fibromyalgia Survival Tools: Laptops

As a freelance writer, I can spend hours upon hours at my computer writing and engaging in social media. My writing is currently my only source of income. It is my life and a part of who I am, too.

Nevertheless, as any of you with chronic pain can attest, the body often can’t keep up with everything else. In fact, as I was sitting at my desk writing tonight, I was overwhelmed by a sudden and painful muscle spasm in my lower back. And immediately, I had to get out of my chair and lie down.

This could have easily put a damper on my inspiration and might have brought my writing to an abrupt halt. As a fibro veteran, though, I just switched to lounge mode. I broke out my heating pad and laptop (both of which I keep readily available by my bedside), plopped (well, more like crawled) into bed, and continued from where I left off with my laptop.

Ultimately, laptops are one of the inventions I thank God regularly for. I really can’t imagine my life without my laptop. With the hand cramps I get now while writing and my inability to handle sitting in a chair for too long, I might have given up on my writing long ago. But my laptop gives me much more freedom and flexibility to deal with my unpredictable fibromyalgia.

At one time, I thought that fibromyalgia would be a death sentence--an end to my quality of life and the termination of my dreams. But I couldn’t have been more wrong.

Having fibrmyalgia can be difficult, but it doesn’t HAVE to stop your life. Never give up. Find ways around your medical condition. Never stop growing and evolving. Ultimately, if the desire is strong enough inside of you, you WILL find a way!

My Tortoise-and-Hare Life

While I was cleaning today, I found some unfinished projects…some things that I should have finished years ago. And I get so incredibly frustrated. Life is full of so many responsibilities and opportunities that it can be a blur. And when you have a chronic medical condition, like fibromyalgia, life can speed by at an even faster pace.

As a little girl, I was really fond of Aesop’s fables. I especially loved The Tortoise and the Hare. Besides the fact that I always wanted a pet turtle, I could easily relate to the tortoise. I wasn’t ever a really fast runner. It seemed like my friends usually left me in their dust. So, the idea of a slow creature beating its speedy competitor really appealed to me. Each time I read that fable I imagined that I was the tortoise and enjoyed every minute of my victory!

Now that I am an adult, though, I’m guilty of wanting to be more like the hare. Instead of creeping along at tortoise speed, I want to be zipping along at lightening fast speed. I get so tired of feeling like the world is constantly racing past me. I want to have boundless energy at my disposal, but unlike the arrogant, lazy hare, I want to seize the day--every day.

Still, I wonder if I would appreciate life and the little things as much as I do now if I were a hare instead of a tortoise. If I were normal without my fibromyalgia holding me back, I might be so busy running here, there, and everywhere that I might not notice the subtle side of life.

Before my major flare up, my daily schedule was so full that I had little to no time to do a lot of the things I enjoy doing. I was so stressed and exhausted that I didn’t even write, something that I can’t stop doing without affecting every other part of me. Yes, I had very good reasons to be so busy (single motherhood, college, etc.), but during those years, I always felt off somehow.

Although I despise my fibromyalgia, I must admit that it has helped to remind me what really matters in life. I was so busy pushing through today to get to the future that I completely forgot the importance of appreciating the here and now. Yes, hard work and goals are important. But we shouldn’t allow the future rob us of today. The future isn’t even guaranteed, and today is gone in the blink of an eye. If we spend all our time looking at the horizon, we miss out on all the wonderful sights and experiences along the way. Perhaps being a tortoise in life DOES have it’s advantages, even though we tortoises don’t usually win the race…

Battle of the Bloat: Margarine

Photo Credit: Roberto Verzo

The longer I live the more I realize how important it is to listen to our bodies.  Our bodies were designed to tell us when something is wrong, when it requires rest or nourishment, and when we have reached our limits.  However, so many people have learned to simply ignore the signs and signals that our bodies communicate so feel.  We continue on with our busy lives until suddenly this communication becomes so loud it CAN’T be ignored and starts interfering with our lives.

Obviously, it is much more logical and useful to train ourselves to perceive the subtle signs than to wait until our bodies are screaming at us.  Yet, it isn’t always easy to know where to start.  My doctor explained to me that fibro suffers have to make many lifestyle changes if they want to better the quality of their lives.  Any number of things could be causing symptoms or making them worse.

One of these critical areas is diet.  Although research hasn’t pinpointed any foods that are specifically detrimental to those with fibromyalgia, many doctors believe that diet can affect fibro symptoms.  "A lot of people with fibromyalgia have sensitivities to particular foods, but it varies from person to person," Liptan tells WebMD. "They might be sensitive to MSG, certain preservatives, eggs, gluten, dairy, or other common allergens."

As such, paying attention to our bodies' reactions to various foods can help us weed out foods that may be making our symptoms worse or even causing additional symptoms.

Noticing that I get much more bloated and gassy now since my major fibro flare started 4 years ago, I decided it was time to pay closer attention to my body and the foods I was eating.  In time, I started noticing a link between margarine and my bloating.

I was raised on margarine and taught that it was much healthier than butter.  As such, I just adopted this dietary habit without much thought as an adult.  Of course, I wasn't a huge fan of margarine and liked butter a WHOLE lot better.  But I reasoned that sometimes we have to compromise for the sake of the greater good.  Little did I know that this choice, which I hoped would spare me from my parents' heart disease and high cholesterol), was actually causing me discomfort and stomach cramps.

As I started to pay more attention to my eating habits, I noticed that on days when I ate margarine, I had considerably more gas and bloating and sometimes even stomach cramps.  Of course, since I try to get the most nutrients out of my diet, what I eat can vary greatly from day to day.  Consequently, I couldn’t say conclusively that margarine was the actual culprit.  To explore my theory further, I decided to stage a little experiment.  For a whole month, I would avoid margarine and only use butter.

By the end of that month, I realized that my stomach had been telling me all along that it didn’t like margarine.  In fact, it had been telling me within minutes of consuming this food, but I just didn’t notice.  A lot of my margarine usage was when I ate eggs and toast for breakfast.  Each time I ate eggs and toast I got this blah feeling in my stomach, and I had always assumed that it was because my stomach hadn’t been ready for such a big or rich meal.  But guess what happened when I continued to eat eggs and toast but with butter?  That’s right!  I didn’t get that feeling at all…and still don’t over 2 months later.

Some people with fibromyalgia may have no ill effects from margarine, but I know it is one food I should avoid.  Since my switch to butter, my gas and bloating has lessened some.  No, it isn’t completely gone, but that is one less food causing me additional symptoms and taking away from my quality of life.

My Kids Made Me a Fibro Warrior

My son at the park

Dealing with a chronic illness can be one of the most difficult journeys in life.  It can leave us feeling hopeless, discouraged, defeated, and shattered.  Deciding how to plan for the rest of your life can seem impossible.  Day-to-day life can be so chaotic and unpredictable on its own.  So sometimes, we are left wondering how we can push on indefinitely.

Ultimately, it’s critical to not focus on our illness too directly.  Yes, we need to familiarize ourselves with our condition because knowledge is the best medicine in the fight against our health issues.  However, too much focus will only consume us and rob us of all the positives in our lives.  Instead, we must find the inspiration and motivation to never quit fighting from the blessings in our lives.

One of my biggest sources of positivity and strength when my life seems to be falling in on me is my kids.  When I feel like a failure they remind me that I’m a wonderful mother.  When loneliness and grief over the life I’ve lost threatens to take over they always seem to there with a hug, kiss, or smile when I need it the most.  When I feel like I’m too tired to press on anymore they give me purpose and determination once more.

Seeing the love in their eyes and watching them try to be just like me, I can clearly see that they look up to me and think I’m invincible.  Little do they know that they are the main reason why I am a fibromyalgia warrior.  They are the heart of my daily battles with my own body.  And they keep me bouncing back, rearing and ready to give it a try another day.

I have other people and things that strengthen me as well (i.e., my fiancé, my faith in God, my creativity), but my children were the ones that originally made it clear that I could never, EVER accept defeat.  I was a single mother at the time, so I knew that my children’s wellbeing depended on me and me alone.  No matter how bad I felt I promised myself that I would never let them down or quit being there for them!

Where do you find your motivation and inspiration to continue your daily struggle with chronic illness?

Spreading My Fibro Story

I just started writing for a new site called Bubblews.com.  As my first article, I submitted a piece about the top 3 things I feel everyone with fibromyalgia should not live without.  I am hoping by spreading the word about fibromyalgia on more sites, understanding will grow and more people will receive the proper support they deserve.  If you are new to fibromyalgia, have a loved one suffering from this difficult condition, or are simply curious, stop on over and read a little more about my story and my take on coping with fibromyalgia:

Top 3 Fibromyalgia Essentials
Submitted by ARDollak on March 08th, 2013
Category: Health

The National Fibromyalgia Association(1) explains that fibromyalgia “is characterized by chronic widespread pain, multiple tender points, abnormal pain processing, sleep disturbances, fatigue, and often psychological distress.” As a fibromyalgia sufferer, I personally know how difficult and frustrating this chronic condition can be. It can turn your entire life upside down, leaving you feeling lost, hopeless, and alone. It affects your relationships, your work life, and even the simplest of chores. You can go from a completely happy and active individual to someone who can’t even make it out of bed on the worst of days. Because fibromyalgia is a difficult syndrome to treat, there are 3 things that are vital for those with fibromyalgia.

Continue reading here.

My War on Germs

Empty antibiotic bottle

I don’t know anyone who enjoys being sick.  Sore throats, fevers, achiness, stomachaches, headaches, and a general blah feeling—they are all a pain in the neck, and at the first sign of illness, we scramble to find someway to alleviate our symptoms and get through it all faster!  We just don’t have the time or the desire to deal with even the slightest of colds.

Unfortunately, dealing with a chronic health issue (such as fibromyalgia) just complicates things.  I don’t know about you, but I know that my little sicknesses tend to not be so little anymore now that I have fibro.  I also tend to get sick more often now, and the illnesses last longer.  It is as though my body is so worn out from dealing with my chronic condition that it doesn’t have necessary resources to kill germs immediately.

On top of this, I have also discovered that being sick often causes an increase in my fibromyalgia symptoms.  I become a stumbling, miserable zombie whenever I get sick now.  In fact, I was out of commission for over a week recently because I was sick on top of a fibro flare.  I was so incredibly thankful when I finally took the last of my antibiotics and woke up feeling much more myself a couple days later!

Frankly, I am sick and tired of being sick and tired!  I have enough on my plate with my fibromyalgia before adding viruses and bacteria into the equation.  As such, I’ve decided that it’s time to take action and find ways to lessen my chances of catching something.  I know it’s easier said than done, but I certainly abhor getting sick, and if I can I avoid even a minute of illness, I’m game!

Over the next week or so, I’m going to research ways to build my immune system and tips for generally staying healthy.  This last bacterial infection was so awful that I’m officially declaring war on any and every germ lurking in vicinity.  I’m finished playing fair.  It’s time to turn another page that will help lead to a happier and healthier me.

Please check back later throughout the month.  I will be sharing some of the research and tips here, so you can join me as well.  Here’s to good health and less sick days!

Fibromyalgia Survival Tools: Slow Cookers

Slow Cooker Cuban Flank Steak

My life has changed since I discovered the ease and the versatility of slow cookers. I absolutely love my slow cooker and seriously don’t know how I lived without it before! My dad actually introduced me to cooking with crock pots about 10 years ago. He made some rockin’ crock pot meatloaf and spaghetti. And his slow cooker chili was out of this world!

However, it was not until after my life-shattering fibro flare about 4 years ago that I came to appreciate how helpful and amazing slow cookers truly can be. As part of my fibro treatment, my doctor recommended that I try to eliminate as much processed foods as possible. They contain so many additives and preservatives that may irritate some fibro sufferers’ symptoms.

Of course, I wanted to try to follow my doctor’s every suggestion, but I feared that this would be difficult to accomplish. I was a single mother with 2 young children with a fibro flare so bad I was stuck in bed at times. I had family to help out during the worst of days, but what about the rest of the time? I hardly had the energy to do the most basic of tasks. How was I going to add meals from scratch to my daily list?

Determined to make this work, I turned to my dad’s delicious slow cooker recipes. Of course, I couldn’t live off of spaghetti, meatloaf, and chili for the rest of my days. But as I incorporated these crock pot meals into my family’s monthly dinner menu, I began to realize the benefits of regularly using a slow cooker:

Slow cookers utilize morning energy. People with fibro tend to have more energy in the morning and continue to lose that energy throughout the day. By dinner time, there often isn’t much energy left to spare for a home-cooked meal. However, with a crock pot, meals can be put together in the morning and cook on low often for as long as 8-12 hours. This leaves little to no additional cooking or preparation later in the day.

Slow cookers are perfect for freezing leftovers. Also larger crock pots are perfect for making extra portions, which can easily be saved and frozen. During a harder fibro day, these frozen leftovers can be thawed and reheated without much trouble for a quick but healthy meal for the whole family. Plus, they are ideal for the most difficult of fibro days when a spouse or friend is offering to help out around the house.

Slow cookers are simple to clean. One of my favorite benefits of slow cookers, though, is the easy cleanup. Hand and back pain/discomfort can make scrubbing dishes extra challenging. Sensitive, dry skin and fibro rash can complicate matters even further. Crock pots, on the other hand, are specifically designed to help limit burning and sticking. A run through the dishwasher usually cleans my slow cooker inserts to a shine. Sometimes, a few stuck spots remain, but it takes only a couple minutes and minimal elbow grease to clean that right up. Additionally, a lot of stores now carry crock pot liners—durable, heat-resistant, disposable bags that fit right into slow cookers—which reduce cleanup even more.

Now that I’ve grown to be more of a slow cooker pro, I use it nearly every day. I’ve made dishes from soups and chili to whole chickens and roasts to even deserts and applesauce. And I plan to continue to expand my crock pot cooking experience.  There are so many enticing and fun recipes to try.

Are you also in love with your slow cooker? Or is there another kitchen gadget that you couldn’t live without?